I'll see Kim Meltzer's ante and raise her the repeal of state-sponsored
hypocrisy. The state House member from Clinton Township this week proposed
that the state decriminalize NCAA office pools. "What makes March Madness
unique is that all kinds of people and sports fans of all levels fill out
their brackets and enjoy the tournament," she said. "It's a crime we
consider that a crime, and I want to change that." Which is nice, I guess.
It is ludicrous that something so harmless as an office pool is illegal. But
why stop with NCAA pools? What about Super Bowl pools and squares contests?
What about NASCAR fantasy leagues or death pools? Is there really much of a
difference? No. But then I don't see the harm in pools. (A death pool,
incidentally, since I know you're wondering, is a pool popular in, ahem,
some newsrooms wherein the goal is to predict which celebs and notables will
croak during the coming year. I'm personally apalled by those, mostly
because I've never won.) Currently, in fact, I may or may not be involved in
a potential "American Idol" pool that may or may not actually exist,
depending on your law enforcement status. If this pool does exist and if
that little cutey-petootie Melinda Doolittle wins, I may or may not win …
something. Or possibly nothing.